Wednesday, 16 March 2011

Where does Kylie keep her reading glasses?

Varifocals. Var-i-focals. That's what it's come to, dear reader.

I was at the optician this week and, um, my eyes are starting to show the deterioration typical of someone of my age.

All along I was blaming the dim lighting (you know, bulbs that magic themselves from 60 to 40 watts), the dirty windows and the intimidatingly small small print. I can't remember when it started, but I've noticed the focus pause. You know? Where you go to read titchy words and, increasingly, it takes a moment longer than it used to to force the little buggers into sharp contrast.

So what I need is new specs. Actually I need additional specs to put on when I want to see something properly. But the idea of taking off my looking at the computer and telly glasses, putting them aside, finding my reading glasses, putting them on, and then remembering what I was hoping to read in the first place is not a good one. Just how many woman hours would I lose in looking for them at the bottom of my handbag?

So, the solution is varifocals. Apparently they are the glasses for all kinds of looking. Cold comfort for the fact my eyes are showing my age.

Soothingly my optician told me that it happens to nearly everyone of this age with depressing inevitability.

That so? Then why don't we see Kylie - who is only a year younger than me - with reading glasses on then? Or Sarah Jessica Parker? Yeah. Let's make whipping the specs out of the handbag to read the menu the new black.

And by the same token, I'd like to see a bit more honesty on aging from other stars.
What about Madonna talking about how she scrutinises her chin for stray whiskers when no one's looking? Yeah.

How about Michelle Pfeiffer revealing how she has to do the pelvic floor thing when she feels a sneeze brewing?

Perhaps, Liz Hurley will share the secrets of her broken veins and Lulu will talk about how she's noticed her bingo wings wobble when she cleans the window.

Do you think

Meanwhile, did anyone see where I put my glasses?

Pic: Seq via Flickr

5 comments:

  1. I got my varifocals last year - a sad day. Took a while to adjust to them but they do the trick.
    Occasionally I will put my contact lenses in but I can't see anything: it's just for show.

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  2. Think I might need to get my eyes tested - Ive been ignoring the fact that I can't read the number on the bus till it gets up close, for years now. Mary Portas doesn't mind getting her specs out on TV.

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  3. The thought of Kylie whipping her glasses out to read the menu made me smile!

    I'm still a smug non-glasses wearer but I'm sure my day will come!

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  4. All good points!

    Maybe Miss Minogue is reliant upon contact lenses to hide her ageing eyes from the world?

    Its times like this you remind me why I'm happy I'm not famous

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  5. I'm wearing the specs now and they're really good for looking through, which is something of a plus point.

    Trish, I'm enjoying seeing stuff!

    TNMA, Another reason to worship at the temple of Mary P..

    Kirsteen :)

    MA, yes famous would be horrid, rich, though, I could handle.

    ReplyDelete

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