Thursday, 16 February 2012

Who would stop a little boy wearing a tutu?

The childminder dropped Boy Three off today, he'd had a good day. "I hope you don't mind, but he was dressing up... he was wearing a pink sparkly ballet tutu."

Why on earth would I mind?

"Some people are strange about it," she explained. 

Now this is an entirely sensible childminder of twenty plus years experience. I expect she's seen all shades of "strange" when it comes to parents, but good grief. 

Then thinking back I remember a friend telling me a story about the mother of visiting child who wouldn't let the boy don a pair of fairy wings "his dad would kill me if he found out".

And Daft Mamma told me about someone who didn't like his son to play with a toy kitchen.

What do they think is going to happen if they let their boys wear a colour that entirely arbitrarily has been assigned to the female of the species?

Are they somehow letting down their brother blokes if they allow a child to learn how to do women's work?

It seems there really are people at large who believe that close contact with things pink, sparkly and traditionally feminine will somehow affect their sexuality. That is a very scary thought. Do they think they are only straight by diligent avoidance of sequins and princess costumes? 

If it's not sexuality, then what? Virility? If erectile dysfunction is caused by pre-school cross dressing then wouldn't the makers of Viagra have cottoned on to that and be giving away extremely shiny dresses to boys at the nursery gates?

If any of my boys is gay, it's how they are and there isn't a think I can do to make a difference to it. And, in any case, why would I? 

But there's a long way to go before Boy Three even consults the stirrings in his pants to find their inclination and, in the mean time, he can wear what he damn well likes. 

PS As for cooking, it's my duty to make sure they know how to do that, I'll be failing my sister birds if I don't.


  1. Quite right. Some people are so odd about this whole thing, aren't they? I hate it when people bash others with their own insecurities, don't you?

  2. I don't get why people get so worked up about boys playing with kitchens and girls playing with cars! Let them be kids and enjoy their childhood!

  3. It's really weird isn't it? MOST of my friends are the other way round and try to distract their daughters from wanting all the pink stuff. I don't really like that either. But one of the weirdest things I've ever heard is my friend buying her niece a toy ironing board because she knew her son would like it. Friend said her husband would have gone mad if she's bought it for the boy, so she bought it for the niece knowing the son would still get to play with it. WTF?

  4. My young nephew insisted on wearing his sister's Disney princess costumes until almost school age. We once spent an entire Christmas with him dressed up as Belle. He grew out of it, which is just as well since Disney don't make costumes for 6ft 7in 17-year-olds - and I don't think his girlfriends would like it much either xxx

  5. Msalliance, It is odd.

    LauraCYMFT, Exactly, they should play with what they want.

    Jo, I think I'd have problems with a husband who didn't want his son to play with an iron.

    Debbie, 6ft 7in - good lord.

  6. crazy, it doesn't get better as you get older either...

  7. Excellent post Billy, it's bonkers.

  8. Excellent post. How stupid that there are some people that actually think it will make their boy gay if he wears pink. I dress my girl mostly in bkue and green -what will happen to her!!!!

  9. I have had the 'ohh you'll make him gay dressing him like that' comments sooo silly!! I loved the innocent years where my boys experimented in everything to find what they enjoyed about life... shame that society changes things because now they are in school there willingness to don the pink sparkly dresses is less forthcoming!

  10. I love that my boy likes wearing his big sister's princess dresses and he loves flowery things and is partial to borrowing her hairclips. I'm just sad that it will all probably stop when he starts school.

  11. I agree with everything you say. I have two boys and their favourite activity / game is playing pretend cooking in their (albeit blue) kitchen. It's just playing!


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